Home
by magicmumu
Summary: Songfic: Emma and Zelena like to get drunk and go on broomstick rides around Storybrooke sometimes... (Emma/Zelena, Wicked Swan crackfic ahead)


Home

by Erin Griffin

Fandom: Once Upon a Time

Pairing: Emma/Zelena (Wicked Swan)

Summary: Emma and Zelena like to go on drunken broomstick rides together sometimes.

*In other words, a not sober person wrote a story about their not sober ship. Song belongs to Breaking Benjamin and their label.

"Come one, Zee," Emma said.

"No. And never call me Zee again," Zelena replied, doing her best to ignore the slight pout on Emma's face. She had lost far too many battles just by looking at her girlfriend's stupidly adorable face. "You always sing when you're drunk and when we're in the air you choose Oz themed songs."

"But you sing 'long, sometimes," Emma said, leaning on the tree next to where Zelena's riding broom was.

"I know, but I like Defying Gravity. Sometimes I think you're mmmmaking funna me," Zelena said slowly.

"No baby!" Emma's eyes widened and the leaned forward. She stumbled slightly but placed a hand on Zelena's shoulder. "singing is free. I'm free. Up there I feel what it must be like to be you. It's fun. I wouldn't make funna you babe. You could drop me."

"Drop you?" Zelena said looking deep into Emma's eyes. She looked scared.

"In the air. Drop me if I make funna you."

Zelena smiled. "Deal. Hop on then."

"Yee!" Emma hopped a little bit on her tippy toes and then followed as Zelena waved her hand and the broom came to life behind the blonde. She watched as Zelena mounted the broom and then she came up behind her girlfriend and climbed on behind her. She wrapped her arms around Zelena's waist and said, "Okay."

"No Defying Gravity,"

"No Defying Gravity," Emma said.

"I mean it,"

"No Defying Gravity," Emma repeated.

"No humming the tune of the Wicked Witch of the West,"

"Okay."

"No songs from the Wizard of Oz,"

"Can I sing Breaking Benjamin?" Emma asked.

"I don't mind rock, so yeah."

"Alright."

"Alright, let's go."

Zelena and Emma rose above Storybrooke's buildings and went over the forested area and the stream before Emma started to sing.

"I've got a little red bow  
And I bought it for you  
'Cause I know you're not fair  
I don't get it, oh well"

Zelena recognized the song and groaned. She turned right suddenly. "I'm going to keep bucking you off if you don't stop!" she called.

"And you color my skin  
And the colors don't blend-"

The broom was then pulled upwards. Emma screamed as she held on tighter to Zelena as the two made a large loop in the air.

" 'Cause I'm gonna get you  
And your little dog too

There's a yellow brick road  
That we follow back home  
'Cause I know you can't wait  
Your belligerent hate"

"EMMA SHUT UP!" Zelena shouted.

"I'm not making fun of you. Keep doing the magic!" Emma called back. "Whee-ha!"

"Emma-!"

"There's no place like home  
There's no place like home  
Like home!"

Zelena did a u-turn, and the broom took the women in another direction.

"I've, got a southern belle too  
And ruby red shoes  
With a body of straw  
Are you sick of it all?"

"Emma I swear to bloody god!"

"There's a man made of tin  
With an oil can grin"

Zelena went zig zag. Emma clung tighter.

"And I'm gonna get you  
And your little dog too"

Zelena lowered them to the ground in front of Emma's house. "Goodnight Emma."

"No. Babyyyy," Emma whined.

"Stop singing."

"I don't want to."

"Then the night is over."

Emma sat back and didn't move from her spot. Then she moved forward again and draped her arms around Zelena and began singing softly in her ear.

"There's a yellow brick road  
That we follow back home  
And I know you can't wait  
Your belligerent hate  
There's no place like home  
There's no place like home!"

Zelena grunted and squirmed in Emma's hold. Damn Emma's koala grip. "What-"

"There's a little white porch  
And you wanted it so  
Can you let me go down  
To the end of the road"

Emma drew out each o sound from her mouth so that it almost sounded like a dog's howling.

"In the black and the white  
A technicolorful life  
Can I stand by your side?  
We can make it alright"

Emma drew back and whipped her head a couple of times up and down in a flailed attempted at head banging.

"Like home!"

Zelena moved had the broom come to life again and the two of them moved up again quickly. Emma screamed and scrambled to hold on to Zelena. "WHAT THE-"

"I told you that I was going to drop you."

"No to don't drop me!"

"No to don't drop you?"

"Please! the song is almost over!"

"Fine! Get it out of your system and then shut the hell up!"

"'Cause I'm home  
There's a little white porch  
And you wanted it so  
Can you let me go down  
To the end of the road  
In the black and the white  
A technicolorful life  
Then another arrived  
It's a cowardly lion-"

"Sing with me Zee! I know you know it!"

"Don't call me Zee," was all Zelena said before she made the broom pick up speed as they got higher above the town, but then she began to sing along with her girlfriend.

"What I want from this world  
What I wanna resolve  
When I want you to stay  
So I wash you away

I don't wanna be bold!  
I don't wanna be cold!  
I don't wanna grow old!  
I don't wanna go hoooooooome!"

Emma cuddled into Zelena after that. "Okay. M'done."

"Thank god," Zelena replied, and the rest of the broom ride was as romantic as it could be for a drunken wicked witch and her less than sober sheriff girlfriend.

End


End file.
